When Ayex started to utter real words, I was kind of envious to Mon because Ayex can clearly say dada. Aside from being able to say it properly, Ayex also knows that that term pertains to her dad. As days goes by, her vocabulary increases. Soon, she was able to say mama. But she does not associate that term to me who is her mother.
Unfortunately, babies can say mama easier than mommy. Not knowing this, we have always thought Ayex that mama pertains to her Lolas (grandmothers). I know what you are thinking. You are right, when Ayex calls out to mama, she is pertaining to her Lolas, whoever is present at that moment.
Although she knows that I am her mother, she does not associate me with other terms except for dede, which means she is hungry and needs to breastfeed. She would cry when she wakes up and I’m no longer beside her. When I am home, she clings to me as if there is no one else at home except the two of us. I know that she knows that I am her mother, but there is a pang of envy when she calls other people appropriately, except for me. There were nights when I would tell her to ask dada to feed her since she can only say dada and dede. The feeling became worse when Ayex learned how to say lolo, lola, and nanay. When she says lola, I know that she pertains to my MIL since I am not her grandmother. I was near depression (I’m just exaggerating) when I heard her say nanay for the first time and my MIL responded to her. She was able to associate nanay to my MIL because that is what Mon and I call her. Ayex probably imitated us. The pang of envy became real and there would be night when I refuse to play with Ayex because I just feel bad.
I know it is not Ayex’s fault. She does not even understand how important it is to be called appropriately. Mon even tried to correct things by explaining to Ayex one time she said nanay and mama one after the other. He tried to correct Ayex’s association in front of MIL and FIL, which almost started an argument. I, on the other hand, decided to go to our room and prepare for bedtime.
Last Sunday, I decided to have some time apart from Ayex and Mon. I met my best friend when I was in fifth grade at the nearby mall. When we got home, my mom narrated what Ayex did when I left. Ayex pulled my mom for a walk outside. She walked here and there while saying MOMMY in a sort of crying way.
Monday, while Mon and I are having dinner, Ayex was playing peek-a-boo with us. She held the curtain near the dining area and hid herself behind. Mon said, “Mommy nasan daw si Ayex?” (Mommy where is Ayex?). After that, Ayex said in a prolonged manner, “MAMMEEEEEE”. When I responded “it—- ba!”, she showed herself to us. Finally… Now, when she asks for milk, she says, “MAMMEEEEEE, dede”.
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