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Mommy’s fear

This post is actually a sequel to another post that I have yet to type. I just had to let it out now so I can stop thinking about it. Not really sure about that, but at least I’m sure writing about it will help.

My morning yesterday was somewhat disastrous: I left my mobile phone at home then my ID with all my keys in the car. I managed to move on a little by indulging with McDonald’s breakfast, which I haven’t done for how long, I can’t remember. (The price that I pay for the food seemed too high for me).

It was Therese and I who went to Mcdo for breakfast. On our way, our topic is my drama queen in the making. Yep, you’re right, I’m talking about Ayex. She’s really a bright and talented little girl that at 17 months, she’s so good at acting up every time she doesn’t get what she wants. No, don’t put all the blame to me if she’s becoming a spoiled brat. Blame me partially because I’m not there to raise her with my own parenting style. What are my choices?

I told Therese that my fear is, what if one day Ayex will no longer be as clingy to me as she is now because she know that MIL is always by side as her kakampi. Therese said that it’s a good thing I am breastfeeding Ayex or else, my fear could have happened long before. She has a point in that. The only thing that differentiates MIL and me is that, I’m the own breastfeeding her. That’s the only thing MIL CAN’T DO.

Fast forwarding this entry.

We arrived home early. As soon as we stopped by our gate, I heard Ayex’s loud cry. I immediately went off the car and see what happened. I saw my brother handing Ayex to MIL. It turned out that she just woke up from sleep. She should still be sleeping but the sound of the car and the barking dogs woke her up.

I tried getting her from MIL and it all started from there. She refused to go to me. She looked at me and then she rested her head again to MIL’s shoulder. If I was emotional that time, I could have cried and left the house off to nowhere. I tried again to get her for the second time, she still refused but I insisted to get her to give her a ride in the car. She still cried even in my arms. She only stopped crying when we’re already outside the house, ready to ride the car.

Fast forwarding this entry once more.

This morning, when she woke up, we went outside our room. Guess to whom she went. You got it right, DARN IT!

If you’re thinking that I’m just a jealous mom, maybe you’re right. Besides, isn’t your daughter should be closer to you than anybody else?

Read more…

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Hi there! I'm Nicquee and this is my little space in this world wide web. I'm a mom of two and is happily married. I started this blog as literally my online journal where I dump my emotions. Over the years, I realized that there is more to write about. Feel free to browse through and I hope you find a thing or two that is relatable to you. If that happens, give me a shout-out!

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